“When You Forgive You Heal. When You Let Go You Grow”.

 

I started dating when I was 16. No make that 15… well actually it was around age 13. Ever since then I have had a guy in my life. Dating came easy for me. I have great social skills and consider myself to be pretty cute. In some ways, not being the hot girl worked more in my favor, because most men are interested in “cute with great personality” type instead of “smoking hot and no personality” type.

We have all met the “a➰➰hole” and most of us have dated them. They are good looking, sometimes unconventional. They are charming, smooth and they know how to make us laugh. They are fun and popular, and before you know it, they get you hooked and then they release the true ass they really are!

A study was conducted in 2014 that found on average, a woman will have her heart broken twice before she meets the person she is supposed  to marry. My thoughts 👀💬 “TWICE”! Yeah ok as I LOL… Because I do not fit into this “average statistic”. Unfortunately for me, this was one time when I wish I was an average statistic.   
With each heartbreak, I’ve had to learn how to forgive like it was the very 1st time. Personally, I think in this day and age with social media, forgiveness is incredibly difficult. How can you not wish vengeance on an ex-boyfriend when you see pictures on his social media sites of him gushing over his new girlfriend. With captions like “My forever #wcw” or “the best thing that has ever happened to me” how can that not sting? But here’s what I have learned along the way. To forgive is to heal. You cannot move on  if you constantly wish for revenge on that “a**hole” ex- boyfriend.

This is something that many of my single girlfriends do not understand or willingly accept. That guy may have hurt you tremendously. He may have cheated, lied, and stolen something. He may have been incredibly mean to you. But revenge, just like forgiveness, does not change them. It changes you! That ex will continue to frolic with his new girlfriend and most likely brag about it online. They will behave this way whether or not you sit in the corner of your room googling “how to get revenge on your ex” or if you decide to pray for forgiveness and wish them well. No matter the choice you make it ultimately affects you. 

Now, don’t get me wrong. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you need to be friends with your ex {personally I think having exs in your life is a no-no, but that’s just me} or that you need to reconcile. 

What it means is you have chosen to forgive them so you can move forward with a peaceful mindset. Forgiveness begins with practice and wishing people well. It is hard and it takes time, but most importantly, it is the right thing to do. Many of us believe in Karma, but not in Karma’s timeframe. Do not forgive simply because you want Karma to figuratively hit that ex in the face while you get something else on the good end from Karma. 

You and I both know there are good men in the world, even if you have had the pleasure of only dating “a**holes” and by the way women can be a➰➰holes too. My motto is “never let the evil or wickedness of someone else destroy the good in you”. Do not let them ruin you by becoming bitter. You must forgive them and stay true to who you are because it releases all that negative baggage.

💝One Love

 

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