Just because he’s emotionally unavailable doesn’t mean he’s evil.
If a man communicates to you, in no uncertain terms, that he is interested in you, but not interested in anything serious with anyone, and you choose to proceed, men see that as the green light to be the naturally great guys they’ve always been. This means they are going to be thoughtful, they are going to be charming and they are going to make your friends laugh when you introduce him to them. They are going to check on you when you’re sick, send you good morning emails and good night text messages. When you go out together, they are going to do everything they are supposed to do to make sure you have a good time and if you let them, they are going to do everything in their power to please you sexually. Why? Because a good guy takes pride in making sure a woman in his company has enjoyed her time with him.
Ladies men use a formula to assign value to the women in their lives and a large part of that formula is derived from how much they believe a woman values herself. If you’ve been giving him all of you while requiring nothing more than his bare minimum then that negatively affects how much he believe you value yourself and he knows in his heart he can never be with you. No matter how much he wants too, men can’t build up the motivation to give you everything if he already knows you’ve been content with him giving you barely anything. Men need to be challenged, men need to know that you’ll accept nothing less than everything.
This is why I tell my friends and female associates repeatedly to act like the CEO and treat men like interns. If he’s not showing up and you’re putting up with it, it’s not his fault, it’s yours for not firing him! You can’t expect a man to value you like a girlfriend if you don’t insist on being treated like a proper girlfriend.